A valuable lesson

Well, today I learned one. I went to the park to play floorball, and I left my purse right outside of the hockey rink where we play. Everyone else leaves backpacks, etc. there (no purses, I was the only girl), and you can see people standing UP behind the wall. And I was on the phone and running late and I just didn't think.

A bunch of little children were watching us for a few minutes, then helped themselves to the extra sticks and balls and started playing at the other end of the rink. After a few nervous looks amongst ourselves, we sort of non-verbally came to the consensus to be nice, I guess, and let them play, made sure they were safe and stayed out of the way where we might run them over.

We get done and I see my purse there. Just as a precaution, I check my wallet.

My cash is gone. I figure I had about $34 (I'm not 100% sure, unfortunately -- I think there was a 20, two 5's, and about four 1's). Not a huge sum, but in my current circumstances, that's groceries and "going out" money for a week.

Some of the kids were still there. I surprised myself with my bold demeanor and my ability to be stern, possibly harsh, but totally in control and not swearing (because based on past experiences with being burglarized, I wanted to freak out on their little asses). I marched up to the two still on the court and demanded to know which of their little friends stole money out of my purse. I don't remember the chain of events, but we ended up in a nearby corner of the park with the rest of them, asking them who took my money.

Those little shits just lied. Some other kids did it. Uh-huh. All but two looked innocent, but those two gave it away. One asked me if it was a $20 bill or something. If I'd had a little more presence of mind, I would have nailed her on that -- how did she know there was a 20? I pretty much gave up -- if I called the cops, the little shits would be home and in bed by the time the fuzz showed up. As I was walking away in disgust, a lady from the park walked up -- I just said it was my own goddamn fault and kept walking. I guess she told the other guys that those kids are a bunch of little thieves. The guys agreed later that the little fuckers were lying.

You know what pisses me off more than anything? That I left my fucking purse sitting out where a bunch of little fucking kids could get to it. And that there was nothing I could do about it, and they knew it. If I had taken one menacing step in their direction I'D be arrested, and the 8-10 or so of them could scatter if the cops actually did show up. And even if they caught them, what could the cops do?

And I'm disgusted that we were nice to these little shitheads. Next time, if there is a next time (some of the guys are talking about not going back, but honestly I say we just know better than to be trusting next time -- why give up our park?), one kid steps up to the side of the rink and I'm all over it like flies on shit, baby. Or whatever the phrase is. I'm not afraid of a bunch of little rat children.

THIS is why I'll never fucking breed. Although I'm sure this is a case of shitty parenting. But this is our future, guys. My friend was just telling me about the movie Idiocracy, the upshot of which is that the stupid people keep breeding like bunnies and the smart people, you know, focus on their careers instead of having children, and in 500 years our country is populated with a bunch of halfwits. Not so far from the truth.

I should address this too: part of the reason everyone went easy on them playing with our gear is that they were all black/latino. You know what? Fuck that, you steal my shit, I don't care if you're fucking Jon Benet Ramsey (pretty little white girl, aren't we supposed to love them bestest?). My early childhood was on the "wrong side of town," if my little town has one of those, and I know damn well I hung out with little white kids who would have done the same. In high school I hung out with a bunch of older white kids who I later found out were burglarizing businesses. So fuck that, don't mess with me and don't think I'm going to meekly walk away because you're a) 8, b) black, c) anything else that allegedly qualifies you for my pity. Or that, really, is supposed to make me feel guilty enough about who I am that I'm too afraid to speak out. Because you know what? Besides the odd Post-its from work and some signs in my rebellious days in high school, I've never stolen a goddamn thing in my life. Never even shoplifted a Tootsie Roll. You know why? I could say my parents told me not to, but the other kids' parents did too, I'm sure. They were mostly Catholic, the religion of guilt and prohibitions. I didn't steal stuff because I FUCKING KNEW IT WASN'T MINE AND IT WAS WRONG.

You know what else? It could have been way worse. They could have taken my whole purse, including my keys, my cell phone, my check card, my ID, my checkbook, my day planner (shit!) and oh, say in the case of the last motherfucker who stole my shit, things like keys to a coworker's house and directions to get there, my social security card, my bank info... Anything else? So I was fucking lucky it was only children who only know how to use cash and only took what they could hide on their persons. And, hey, they didn't take the keys and help themselves to my car.

But let this be a lesson to all: people suck. If there's anything they can take from you, you best assume they will. (Unless it's a case like my brother's mugging, where they in fact seemed only interested in beating the shit out of someone -- they took $8 from his wallet, but left his Discman on the ground next to his bloody body.) If you leave your shit unattended for any reason, it may not be your FAULT someone else's actions resulted in the loss of said shit, but you really have no one to blame but your own stupid naive-assed self.